Lovely Haiku

Apparently Tim's friend Mackenzie meant to write a haiku earlier, but this is what he got and it's awesome. Enjoy!


Mackenzie's Lazy
Didn't Write No Haikus, oops
TOO LATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! REMISSION!

Remission

Tim's parents and us with Dr. G, over half of us holding up Victory signs!

Tim is officially in remission! We went to the doctor today to get the results of the PET and CT scans from this week and Dr. G said that the PET scan was completely clear, including the spots on his pelvis and ribs, and that Tim is in full remission. He also said that he doesn't think that the cancer will return and that we will hopefully be done with it for good. We are all so very, very happy. Thank you everyone for your kind words and supportive thoughts and prayers. This ordeal has been made so much easier because of family and friends. For getting us a car, attending appointments with us, sending care packages, being there to talk, thinking of and praying for us and so many, many other things, we are grateful to a point where it's difficult to express. Thank you.

The future... Tim and I are done with our semesters and we're looking forward to spending time with family next week and friends throughout the break. Tim is finished with his graduate degree, so he is going to be looking for a full-time job very soon. I'm finished with my job at the publishing company on the 30th and should start student teaching for my special education degree in January. If all goes as planned, I'll be done with grad school and ready for my own classroom next year. Somewhere in there we have to make up the wedding, but we'll figure that out as we go. It's so nice to be making near-future plans again!

Tim still has a couple of spinal chemotherapy treatments left and I'll update this periodically as he continues on the remission path. We're looking at 3 month scans for a while and then they'll be tapered off to every 6 months, yearly, etc. Thanks again, everyone, and we wish you all a wonderful holiday and a Happy New Year!!!

Updating

Final PICC pic


Tim's still hanging in there! He had what we hope is his final week of the bags last week and got his PICC line taken out on Friday. I'm sure it's really freeing for him not to have a little tube flapping around every time he moved his arm and he thoroughly enjoyed taking his first shower in months on Monday night.

That tube was in his arm for almost 4 months!

T has been experiencing some painful headaches as a side effect of the lumbar puncture that they had to do on him last Thursday to inject the spinal chemotherapy. He read somewhere that it has to do with the spinal fluid leaking out of the hole that was made and away from his cranium, causing the headaches. I don't pretend to know if all that is accurate, but it sounds valid to me. The pain is lessened when is either standing or lying down, but it is particularly bad when he is sitting. Unfortunately, there isn't much lying down or standing around during finals week, so he has been in pain. The effects are only supposed to stick around for about a week, so we're hoping that tomorrow he feels better.

The LP wasn't bad last time, but this time he got up before the allotted time. He was meant to lie completely flat and still for at least one hour before moving around, but they were pumping him full of liquids and he had to use the bathroom REALLY bad, so he got up after 45 minutes. Let this be a lesson to anyone who needs a lumbar puncture in the future. We're not sure if that's the reason for the headaches all week, but it's something he'll certainly avoid next round!

Giving thanks...

What's new...we went to the doctor again on the day after Thanksgiving. We got basically the same news as last time. Dr. G warned us that Tim may need a couple of additional chemotherapy cycles, depending on the results of the tests, but also said that was unlikely. So next week is the expected final EPOCH treatment, the week of the bag. On Friday, Tim gets the PICC line removed and we're both very excited about that! No more nightly flushings and showers are back in! If T does need to get the additional treatments, he will need another PICC inserted, but we don't expect that to happen. The one he currently has is about 15 weeks old and Dr. G said it is time to remove it, that it wouldn't make it through 6 more weeks. The removal is a simple process, according to the nurse Kara.

I thought I had written a post about the spinal chemo, but apparently I did not. Tim has the second one on Thursday of this week. Tim described it as a pinch and a burn, not bad at all. Of course, Dr. G said that it was easier for T because he's the optimum candidate, tall, thin and young. As usual during this entire debacle, Tim complains very little. He's a tough cookie! On the other end of the spectrum, directly after my flu shot earlier this year...

We haven't been up to much in the past few weeks. Our semesters are wrapping up and we've kept busy with that, plus work for both of us. I have only a few more weeks left at my job and am trying to get everything situated there. I'll start student teaching in special education for junior high aged students on the 4th of January. T is still working part time for the University of Chicago, but when he's done with the chemo and grad school at the end of the year, he'll start looking for a full time position. Needless to say, big and exciting changes are coming!

Thanksgiving was lovely, full of feasting, football and a rousing round of Yahtzee. There's so much we are thankful for this year. Tim's parents and Hana came to my family's house and we all worked together to make a delicious meal. Sitting next to me in current time, Timberly just thoroughly enjoyed a large plate of leftovers and we have plenty more in the fridge. I participated in my first and hopefully final Black Friday shopping spree the following day and then it was back up to Chicago for the doctor's appointment. Yesterday I went down to my uncle's house for another family dinner, but T was worn out from the traveling and opted out. We lazed the day away today, as Sundays tend to go around here, and we're preparing for finals in the coming weeks. Wish us luck!

More info

For those of you who wondered, we do not yet know anything about the growths on Tim's ribs and hip or about whether or not the lymphoma has been eradicated in the bone marrow. Tim only took a CAT scan for Friday's results, so they could not tell about the bone marrow. About the ribs and hips, the doctor said that there was no mention of any abnormalities noticed from the CAT scan, but the PET scan would give a better view of that. In mid-December Tim will undergo another PET scan and bone marrow biopsy, in addition to another CAT scan and the combined results will be compared with the initial results and the PET scan from last week. The doctor did tell us that since the bone marrow is made up of small cells he expects the lymphoma to not be a problem in that area, but I'm not really sure what that means. We were a little elated by the good news to focus on questioning that, so we'll have to take him at his word for the time being.

At our doctor's appointment on Friday we found out more about the spinal chemotherapy in addition to the good news about the tumor shrinking. Tim starts this coming Thursday. This is one of his chemo weeks and they will do it during his two remaining chemo rounds. He gets four treatments and they are spaced out at 3 weeks each, so he will be getting the final treatment during the second week in January. I will be going in with him on Thursday for the procedure, right after my dentist appointment.

Not so fun fact: Chemo patients are discouraged from visiting the dentist. There is a concern that if work must be done that opens a wound in the mouth, an infection could be acquired that the weakened immune system of a chemo patient may have trouble fighting off. I'm not sure if that's just for this type of chemo, but it doesn't seem like it would be.

Speaking of infection, I'm sick. Someone I work with contracted the H1N1 virus plus I observe a couple of days a week at a school with hundreds of kids, so we were prepared. We stayed for the most part in separate rooms, didn't prepare meals together (which was easy, as I was not eating), and I carried around a can of Lysol with me for the better part of the week thus far. The worst part was the ride home from my parents' house this weekend. I just kept the window open and breathed away from Tim as I slept. So far he's avoided catching it and hopefully we'll be in the clear soon.

We got to see and enjoy the company of the lovely Jessica this weekend, before I was ill. We went to a German restaurant and had steins of beer and dances with elderly men. On Saturday, we drove home to see my sister Angie and her rambunctious pups who are visiting this week were last. We had a bit of a hastily thrown together family reunion on Sunday. It was gorgeous weather and fabulous company...had I not been ill it would have been better, but it was still nice to see most of my dad's side of the family altogether again, plus a few members of my mom's side. I wish I had a picture of all to post, but we had to dip out of there right after dinner, when I started feeling really ill again. Instead, I'll leave you with this:

We're celebrating!

I promise to write more later, but for those of you who knew we had an appointment with the oncologist today, know that the large tumor in T's chest has been reduced over 80%. The doctor said that it was the best that he had hoped for and he thinks we're going to get rid of this thing with the treatment Tim is currently receiving. Good news at last!!!


T under the completely fabulous table my parents built for us. Lovely place mats, too, courtesy of the Roebers and Tim's relatives in Thailand.

El muerte de nuestra boda...

For the weekend that was designated for our wedding, T and I decided to spend time with family and friends. Scratch that. I decided to spend the entire day in bed and Tim decided we would instead go out. I had traveled home for part of the week to see my dear friend Deborah, who was visiting our hometown from North Carolina and whom I haven't seen in almost two years. We got ourselves into the usual Kewanee trouble on Thursday and Friday and she was run out of town at the end of the visit with the people of our fair hometown letting loose a collective sigh of relief that such a troublemaker had once again departed from their midst.

So Saturday rolled around and I was still trying to come up with justification for not leaving my mother's couch. Master procrastinator that I am, I managed to rise off of said couch at around 11:30 in the morning, about 3 hours after my expected departure and only after T called me about 1/2 dozen times to get my rear up and at 'em. I finally arrived in Bloomington around 4:30 and with the aid of Timmeh started making the meal we had planned for everyone. We made rat shaped meatloaf, mummy mashed potatoes, mummy appetizers and monster's eyes deviled eggs. I got frustrated halfway through and left to go take a shower after one plate was made, so my sister Becky and Tim prepared the rest of the plates. All said, I think it turned out to be a hauntingly delicious meal.

While we hadn't planned to go out after dinner, our friend Ashley drove all the way over from Kewanee and she had such an awesome costume on that we felt an obligation to the people of the twin cities to take her out for their enjoyment. Shenanigans ensued.

So we're not yet newlyweds and it wasn't the Halloween we thought it would be, but it was probably the best we could have expected, under the circumstances. Tim felt good physically the whole time and we were with people we love, so that makes all of the difference!

Spinal Chemotherapy

I should mention, the spinal chemotherapy has been planned by Dr. G from the beginning, but he failed to mention it to us. It is a precautionary step, that's all. I just accidentally freaked out Tim's mom because I forgot to mention that during our call after the visit on Friday, so I thought I'd bring it up here. Sorry, Lori!!!

Visiting Dr. G

Just before the chemo rounds, we always have an appointment with Tim's oncologist, Dr. G. Last Friday was one of those informative visits.

One new thing we found out about during this visit is that Tim is going to need chemotherapy to his spine. The procedure involves Dr. G inserting a needle into Tim's spine to extract some spinal fluid, mixing that fluid with chemotherapy, and injecting it back into T's spine. He didn't sugarcoat it; it will be painful. It will happen on four separate occasions and we do not yet know when the first round will be.

Tim did not need blood transfusions at all during this cycle, so again the dosage of his chemo will be increased. This does not say anything about the chemo: whether or not it's working. It just means Tim's body is able to fight off infection despite the treatments.

We were also informed on this visit that on Friday the 6th of November, we will know the extent to which the chemotherapy is working. Tim has a CAT scan of his chest and pelvis during Tuesday of that week, which we will be discussing during the appointment. The results of that test will again be analyzed when they are compared to another CAT scan to be done after the sixth and hopefully final chemotherapy treatment (the week ending on December 4th). Around the time of the second CAT scan, T will be getting another PET scan and bone marrow biopsy, just as he did during the diagnosis stage. Hopefully that will be the full circle, the ending mimicking the beginning.

If all goes well, after the sixth round we will be waiting for the cancer to return, running tests every three months at first and then every 6. If it doesn't come back in the next five years, it's not likely to return. Of course, as I'm typing this I'm looking for wood to knock on. We've seen already how much regard life has for our expectations of it.

So we're starting a new round this week...wish us luck!

Birthday Weekend

Sorry for the lapse, everyone! Happily I report that it's merely because of my busy schedule and nothing to do with any bad news related to Tim. I'm going to try to write a few entries today to catch up...this one is essentially cancer-info free.

Last weekend was my birthday weekend and it was wonderful. I knew Tim was taking us on a secret trip on Saturday, so on Friday night when I had plans with my friend Becca, she agreed to go shopping with me. As most people who know me well can either attest to or imagine, this was a generous task for her to agree to because a.) I hate shopping with an undying passion and b.) I have very little fashion sense and generally am glad to stick to the hand-me-downs of my more fashion-conscious sister.

When I pulled up to Becca's place, I had to run into the house to use the restroom before we set off on our expedition, when SURPRISE! Becca had invited my sister Becky and our friends Nicole and Jenn to her place for a birthday party, which I had absolutely no clue about. Shopping was clearly off, which was fine by me! After we sat down to dinner, the doorbell rang and Becca innocently remarked, "The neighbors must have locked themselves out." Naively thinking nothing of this, I continued to chow down on the delicious stuffed shells she had prepared when in walked Becca followed by my dear Mommala! I was again taken aback, but was a little wiser when the doorbell again about 15 minutes later. Expecting my pops to have been waiting in the van to make a dramatic entrance of his own, I was once more caught off-guard when Bobbi and Sarah, two of my other sisters, walked in. It was incredibly touching that everyone had gathered from Chicago and around the state to make sure my 27th birthday was one of fond memories overshadowing the cancer-related ones. The party commenced and we had a wonderful time playing games and having headstand contests! Mother was of course behind the camera for the picture, as always!

The next morning I returned to our apartment slightly worse for the wear, but excited for the road trip. I had it narrowed down to a visit to either Madison or Milwaukee from Tim's description of the plan (a city outside of IL within a few hours of Chicago), so I knew when we took the Edens at the 90/94 split that we were Milwaukee bound. After a pleasant drive we arrived at the Pabst mansion, one of the few historic former residences left on what used to be a street of extravagant estates. The mansion is being restored by the citizens of Milwaukee and so far it is absolutely gorgeous. I would recommend it without pause to anyone who even remotely enjoys such things and is in the area.

Tim and Mr. Pabst

Somewhere in the tour at the Pabst mansion the guide mentioned that of the other three remaining mansions on the street, two were made into stores and one was a bed-and-breakfast. You can probably guess, then, what the next surprise was, but I didn't see it coming. We stayed for the night at the Brumder Mansion Bed and Breakfast down the road and it was gorgeous. The extremely cordial host gave us a tour of the open bedrooms of the house when we first arrived and I was amazed by the lavish accommodations. All of the rooms had their own bathrooms and a few of them had HUGE jacuzzi tubs. We stayed in the gold room and settled ourselves in quite quickly. After a bit of time at the bed and breakfast, we headed downtown to see some sights and have dinner at a nice little French restaurant where T had made reservations. Troopers that we are we went out after dinner for one drink, but we were so exhausted that we trudged back to our room by 10 and were in bed by 11:30. In that room, I slept better than I have in months!

We woke up the next morning to a delicious breakfast shared with some fellow travellers. After sharing tips on where to visit, T and I headed off to the Milwaukee Art Museum. Go, go, go, I command you. We were there for 3 or 4 hours and didn't have time to fully soak it in. We had a late lunch after the museum and then started the drive back to Chicago. Our trip was the perfect mix of relaxation and recreation, as only T knows how to plan it. The entire time we were in the city, I just kept saying to Tim, "You know, I wouldn't mind if we lived in Milwaukee!" I just hadn't realized it was such a cool place. At only a couple of hours from Chicago, I'm sure we'll be heading back there sometime in the near future.

The greatest wealth is health. -Virgil

No blood transfusion again this week!

The bags come off...

T finished his second round of this regimen on Friday. Overall the round went fairly well. Though his medication was intensified after his high blood counts last round, he did not feel more adverse side effects with the more intense medication. He slept more, but that's about all in terms of differences from last time.

Timmeh did end up going to his parents' house last Thursday to drop off some grass transplants that we got from my mom's garden for his dad's yard, but he only ended up staying for one night. Hana, his cousin, had the flu and his parents had been ill earlier in the week, so it wasn't exactly perfect timing. He reported that his mom had them quarantined from each other on different levels of the house, with Hana in isolation in the basement and T confined to the upstairs. Robert Frost wisely said, "Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in," and unfortunately for Hana, it seems he was correct.

Yesterday he got the shot that makes him sore and he's feeling the pain today. I got home tonight to him complaining about the pain and he had apparently forgotten about the expected side effects because he hadn't yet taken any pain pills. So he took those and 1/2 hour later, that and a belly full of superfood combined with a comfy recliner and a video game subscription (thanks, Richard!) has alleviated much of the pain. We'll see if he needs a blood transfusion on Thursday. Homework time...

Return of the Chemo

We're at the hospital again today. Tim's blood counts were so high throughout the first cycle that he did not need a single blood transfusion, which we're told is a very good thing. He took the opportunity to get ill last week and recovered at a relatively regular rate. As a result of his maintained blood counts, though, they increased the dosage to give him a more intense round for this cycle, so there is a chance that the side effects of this cycle will be more severe than for the last.


Speaking of ill, I am. Consequently, when I am cooking for us I get to utilize the lovely masks that mother graciously gifted us with, which one individual in our household finds endlessly entertaining and about which the other gets almost equally grumpy. Another effect of my cold is that T may be going to stay with his family this week. When he is wearing the chemo bags, he gets nervous about catching the tubes on something. As our apartment isn't exactly colossal, he feels a tad squeezed in the home space, another reason to visit his parents' more spacious abode. I'm all for it, as it will afford me time to clean and do schoolwork, but I wish he would have told me before we dropped a load of cash stocking up on superfoods last night. Le sigh. If he thinks it's that easy to avoid my sauteed kale, he's another thing coming...there will be a plate prepared and waiting for his return on Friday!

We obtained a second car this past weekend, so we'd like to give a shout out to my parents and Becky for that. Ever distrustful of Chicago drivers, my dad lent my sister one of his cars and she gave us hers for the time being, so now T can drive himself to the hospital and to work when he is feeling well enough to do so. Now we're rockin' two Chevy Cavaliers at our place, Goldie and Corn Hunter. This should definitely make things easier for us. Thanks, fam!


We took advantage of fall a bit ago with Tim's family by visiting an apple orchard near their house.

Awesomeness...

I'm happy to report that Tim's blood counts were high enough on Friday that he did not need a blood transfusion! We go in Tuesday for what will possibly be his first. The shot that they gave him to make the blood counts go up more quickly is still causing some flu-like symptoms and he has a bit of a cold on top of that, so he's not exactly comfortable right now. However, he is in elevated spirits because of the high counts and he should be able to kick the cold pretty normally. Right now it's just tons of rest and vitamin C for him. We are at his parents' house this weekend and are going to have dinner tonight with family and our friend Josh. I think he rests best here; in fact, he's napping as I type...perfect opportunity to squeeze in some homework!

Achy-breaky body

Tim is feeling the discomfort in his bones, especially in his jaw. Other than that, no updates. Still no nausea, hurrah! His first blood transfusion is on Friday...wish us luck!

Bionic Man

Possibly because it is his first time with this regimen, Timmeh is feeling pretty good right now. His nausea is controlled by the medication and he's been sleeping a good amount. The chemo bags were taken off yesterday morning and he had a push of one final type of chemo for the week, which did make him a little ill, but only for about an hour. He's eating well and in good spirits, just more tired than usual. We weren't sure what to expect, but this round has been easier than the last round, which I've found out might be because all of the drugs are diluted and over a longer period of time, which makes sense (thanks for the tip, Candy!).

Tomorrow we are to go in to the hospital for a shot of neupogen/neulasta. From what we understand, there's nothing they can do to prevent his blood counts from going down, thus suppressing his immune system and making him susceptible to illness and infection, but this shot is meant to make him recover from the low blood cell counts faster. Our nurse from yesterday said that days 8-11 after he starts treatment are when his immune system is at it's lowest, so during that time Tim will be avoiding his usual evenings of taking public transportation to the most crowded clubs downtown (sarcasm, moms). By Saturday, with any luck, his counts should be on their way back up.

We had an adventure this evening. After we had a nice short walk around the neighborhood, T took a bath and then we did the first Heparin flush. Every day that Tim does not have chemo or a transfusion, the PICC needs to be flushed with a Heparin solution to prevent clotting in the line. What this means for us is yet another test in trust, me injecting Tim with solution nightly. As some of you surely know, I'm not exactly the picture of grace and coordination, so T was understandably nervous. I come from a long line of nurses, though, and it must be innate. It went as smooth as butter, I'm elated to report!



Someone really needs to learn Photoshop.

It starts...

Tim started the new regimen yesterday. Today we are sitting in the hospital room getting the Rotuxin treatment, which is the one that takes 4-6 hours. T is tired, but in good spirits. He didn't feel any nausea until this morning, which is what we expected after the last round.

Yesterday they placed the PICC line in his upper right triceps, which means there are two small tubes dangling from his arm at all times. Currently there are bags of chemo attached to the tube, each about the size of a quart-sized Ziploc bag. He has a shoulder bag holding the chemo packs around his body and it fits under his arm, reminiscent of leather water pouch favored by travelers or adventuring archaeologists. The attached bags make bathing and sleeping a challenge. Last night as Tim was trying to climb into the bathtub, I held the pouch for him and prepared to help him wash up. I remembered that I hadn't brought in a towel for when he was finished, so I went to get it...while carrying the chemo bag. Had it not been so utterly terrifying, it would have been hilarious. Sleeping has also been interesting. I set T up in the middle of our queen sized bed with the chemo bag on his right side and his phone and a light within reach, so if he needs help getting up and I'm not answering his pleas, he can ring me from the bedroom. I am for the time being sleeping on the recliner in the living room.



We made sure to plan a fun weekend to preface the new regimen and our new schedule. My cousin Dan was married on Saturday and we stayed in a hotel for that both Friday and Saturday. Tim got tired toward the end of the eve on Saturday and he went to bed a bit early, but at the beginning of the dancing portion of the reception, he was a twisting machine! Sunday we had a quiet day of reading, napping, baking tomatoes and general recovery and on Monday, we had lunch in Chinatown with our friend Richard and his roommate and saw the lovely Jessica and her Tim for a bbq that night. It was a tiring weekend, but a nice lead-in to the long week ahead.

Better a bald head than no head at all. -Austin O'Malley

T's hair has started to go. Last night I buzzed his head and now his beard is longer than his hair, which is fun. We've read that in certain circumstances chemo patients lose only the hair on the dome, but it seems as though his beard is also falling out. Picture an eyebrow-free Yul Brynner; that's the look we're going for. To the blazes with Nefertari...if anything can top our canceled Halloween wedding plan (Frankenstein's monster and the bride), it's Tim as pharaoh and Charlton Heston for me.

We traveled to Neponset to see my parents and pick up a new used chair this past weekend. My uncle and dad were thoughtful enough to load it in the van and our friends Mike and Becca helped me move it upstairs, graciously accepting farm fresh produce as reward for their toils. As anyone who has been to our place knows, our couch and love seat have seen better years, possibly decades. The new addition is a lift chair that almost completely reclines, so when he starts the intense treatment next week and he must have the chemo bags attached to him at all times, Timberly will have an alternative to the bed to rest in and remain comfortable. See the picture and visualize it in dark green. It stands him almost completely for when he's feeling weak. It's pretty rockin'.

T has finally gotten his appetite back, almost just in time for the chemo to start. This week we are stuffing him with full fat and calorie foods, hoping to put on a little of the weight he's lost before he starts feeling cruddy again. A side effect of his cancer, then, is that I have gained 4 pounds, one more reason why it's good that I no longer need to worry about that wedding dress! I baked Tim an apple pie last night with apples from the farm and we're going to eat it with ice cream when I get home from trading cars with my mom this eve. It required the use of 3 sticks of butter and a full cup of sugar, so this baby better be as good as it looks and smells. While it's far from a superfood, I think we'll worry about getting back to those when he's eating more selectively again. For now, we chow down!

Fungus Factories

Today, T and I went in for him to get some blood work done. His white blood cell count is just in the normal range despite the chemo, which is a plus. It is considerably lower than before the chemo, which is expected. We'll find out from Dr. G exactly what that means next week, but the nurse who works closest with him said it is a good thing.

While we sat in the lobby, a man wearing street clothes and a surgical mask (presumably due to a compromised immune system) walked in and asked the receptionists for a wheelchair to take him to his car. He happened to leave at the same time as us and as we were waiting for the elevator, he informed us that we should wear shoes in a hospital. He asked if we were "trying to make a fashion statement," at which point we discerned that we had unconsciously agitated him by wearing flip-flops to our appointment. He called our feet "fungus factories." The security guard pushing the wheelchair rolled his eyes and we waited for the next elevator.

New news

We heard from the nurse today about the results of the bone marrow biopsy and Tim's marrow has been taken over by the lymphoma. This means the cancer is more aggressive than the doctor had initially thought and it completely changes the treatment for T. To borrow from Vonnegut, so it goes.

The chemo treatment will still occur in one out of every three weeks, but instead of going in for a few hours during one day of chemo week, he'll be at the hospital every day. Generally it will be on Monday through Friday, but for the first treatment, we'll be going Tuesday through Saturday (Labor Day threw us off schedule). T is going to have a PICC line inserted into his arm on the first day of the new treatment. This will stay in throughout the regimen, hopefully until November or December. On the first chemo day of the week, he will then get two bags attached to the PICC line, each with a pump. One of the bags will have two types of chemo in it and that will stay in place through the entire week. The other bag will have another type of chemo in it and will need to be changed every 24 hours by the staff at our hospital. This entire process will be done with him as an outpatient, so while he does need to be at the hospital daily, he will not need to stay over. On the final day, Tim will have both bags removed and will have a fourth type of chemo that will only take about an hour to run. Then we're footloose and fancy-free for four days!

In each of the two weeks between chemotherapy, Tim will need bi-weekly blood or platelet transfusions. The number may go up or down, depending on how he responds, and we will be doing this on Tuesday and Friday. The transfusions will require 6-8 hours in the hospital and they will use blood banks as sources. I was concerned about needing donations from relatives for the platelet transfusions, but apparently as long as we all visit our Red Crosses like the upstanding citizens we are, he'll have access to plenty of the necessary fluids. My ignorance of the transfusion process reared her ugly head with that concern.

This almost feels like starting over. There is good news in all of this, though. We are not sure yet, but they may have to do fewer of these treatments than he would have had for the R-CHOP (original regimen), so he could be done earlier than December, but we are not getting our hopes spectacularly high. I believe the number of treatments depends on how he responds over time, something we need to clear up with the doctor before getting excited. More good news is that Dr. G is confident, in his words, that this regimen will rid T's body of the lymphoma. We have an appointment to get more information next Friday and we'll get started with the new chemo on the day after Labor Day.

So every week in the near future, Timmeh (and I when I can) will be in the hospital for at least two days. We are trying to figure out how we will schedule all of these appointments while I work full time, have class two nights, and am expected to observe a classroom for two days of the week this semester and Tim works part time and has class two nights per week. Luckily, we have family 'relative'ly close in proximity and some wonderful friends who have offered to run carpool for T when we need them. Plus, my amazing boss and lovely coworkers have been nothing but supportive of us and have offered more understanding than I could have forseen. Our cup overfloweth.

"This guy!"

Birthday Parties and Dog Beaches

Gorgeous flowers from last week from our friends Elif and Crystal. Thanks, ladies!



This weekend we went to see Timmeh's parents in Rockford on Friday, picked up a side of Hana, and went to a birthday party on Saturday (HBD again, Dacky!). While it was good for T to be out with some friendly faces, he was quite petered out and we went on our merry way after only about an hour. Little did we know, the party was not going to be the most interesting part of the evening...

We went home and Tim was completely exhausted, so Hana and I watched a movie (Ponyo on the Cliff by the Sea, which I def. recommend) and he trotted off to bed. Since he started his medication a few weeks ago he generally gets up about every hour and a half to two hours. It was no surprise, then, that halfway through the movie he was up and around the apartment only to go back to bed after a handful of minutes. What was curious was that he was up three additional times in the following hour. When the movie ended, I trudged to bed only to find T freaking out in the bedroom. It's a part of the cancer that his skin itches a lot, but when I walked in he was clawing at himself like a madman. Let me tell you, this is not something one witnesses and thinks, "Hm, I'd really like to hop into bed with that!" Cue the horns, we have a new symptom...time to find a solution.

This past week, T's aunt sent us a natural brush with very stiff bristles to use on his skin, so I broke that out and started to go over his body. Forgive me for my farm girl revealing herself, but it was a bit like brushing our pigs to show them at the 4-H fair (Sorry, honey!). After the brush, I rubbed on some Aveeno lotion with oatmeal. After a second coat, T thought he'd be able to sleep, so I settled in and was out within 3 minutes. Within four, he was scratching again. At this point, it's likely been 20 minutes and it's around 12:30 in the morning. T decides to take a shower and I was so, so tempted to roll over and fall back asleep, but with my mother's voice in my ear, I rolled out of bed, got dressed, and went on a quest for a 24-hour Walgreen's, not a difficult thing to chance upon in Chicago. Poor Hana trying to sleep on the couch probably thought we were both slightly insane.

I let Tim know where I was going and spent a good 20 minutes at Walgreen's trying to find something to help. T's mom had suggested Gold Bond and the pharmacist Benadryl, so I got some cream of both and Gold Bond foot powder. They didn't have regular Gold Bond powder, so our bedroom, our bed and both of us smell of foot powder...acquaintances, ye be warned. I can only imagine what the cashier and his three buddies standing around the checkout desk thought when I came up with my purchases at 1 a.m. When I got home, we started the application process over again, this time with Benadryl cream and Gold Bond powder instead of lotion, and we were able to finally get to sleep around 1:30 or 2. We put our brilliant minds together and realized that Tim should not mix non-prescription Tylenol-PM with all of his medicines. Who knew? Now we do.

Today we got up and Hana helped me run a bunch of errands. We later put her on a train towards Rockford and went to the Montrose dog beach to watch the pups play in the water. We couldn't have picked a nicer day. T could breathe easier near the water, so we stayed there for a few hours. He napped intermittently and watched the pooches play and I got through as much of my book as I could before school starts next week. It was a great day to bring an end to our summer break. And back to school we go...


Thanks for the cards, everyone! We're going to put them on the wall next to the bed (to smell like foot powder, too!).

Upswinging

Yesterday was definitely the worst. He drifted in an out of sleep all day, which was nerve-wracking for me at work to not be able to call and check-in lest I wake him. Tim ate hardly anything and only when coaxed. The entire 9 hours I was out of the house he had only a glass of seltzer water. Following advice I found online, I made a very bland chicken noodle casserole and served it at room temperature for him. He ate about a bite every five minutes, but finished his plate so that he could take his pills. He reported feeling much better after food.

Today he's all good, though he was initially nauseous when he first woke up to take his first set of a.m. pills. Those he has to take on an empty stomach, so he goes back to sleep for a couple of hours before taking his second a.m. pill set that must be taken with food. When he woke up the second time, he inhaled a grilled peanut butter and banana sandwich and was up and around for a while before crashing for a nap about an hour ago. It is such a relief to see him feeling better.

I'm not sure if the next chemo sessions are going to get progressively harder, which is something we're going to ask Dr. G about, but at least now we know a little more what to expect. His future sessions are going to be scheduled for Thursdays, so if the worst days are always the second day after I'll be with him the entire day on Saturdays to get him to eat and run out for anything that he needs. The timing will work out perfectly!

Some of his symptoms are subsiding, as Dr. G said we might expect. He doesn't have night sweats any longer, which our pillows and sheets are thankful for, and the coughing is much better. I'm picturing the tumor shrinking away in his chest, something that is likely inaccurate at this point, but makes me feel better regardless. The tumor is pictured below at Tim's suggestion, along with a dazzling view of our neighbor's air conditioner. This is the one from Dr. B's office. The tumor is on his right side, so it's just below and to the left of the white dot above the air conditioner. I'd highlight it, but I'm an absolute dolt when it comes to editing pictures.

Chemo - the day after

Today was definitely more difficult for Tim. He woke up around 7:30 with nausea, stomachache, etc. I was able to work from home again, which was very helpful. We had some pill confusion, but got it sorted out and T napped most of the day. He was able to eat a little and was feeling a bit restless by the time his sleep quota was met. We haven't been out of the apartment outside of appointments for a while, so we went to see District-9 in the early eve. I found it funny that he was able to suppress the old cancer-cough for 2 hours while the elderly gent behind us couldn't stop from kicking T's chair and commenting on each scene, but we thoroughly enjoyed the movie despite. When we came home, I made him some sauteed spinach and chicken for din-din. He ate it all and took one of his sleeping pills for the first time and is about to be out. Hopefully he feels better tomorrow...

Tim v. Chemo - round 1

It is amazing to me how quickly new experiences can become normal. We went in to the andrology laboratory today and then to T's first round of chemotherapy. Two hospitals in one day, ew. Thankfully Tim is feeling well tonight, watching his beloved Cubs likely lose another one. He has so far not experienced any nausea or pain, just a general feeling of tiredness. He decided after chemo that it was imperative that he have a chocolate cake shake from Portillo's, so he was able to eat just after the treatment. He also had some garden-fresh tomatoes (Thanks, Mommala!), an avocado-tuna salad and some bean and kale soup. No worries, moms, I'm making him eat his superfoods!

Chemotherapy was a lot different than the Rotuxin treatment. He was sitting up in a chair fully dressed this time instead of in a bed in jammies. The nurse put on a full gown, face mask and gloves and pushed two enormous syringes of bright red fluid through Tim's IV. There were also two bags of fluids hung, plus some saline. The whole experience took about two hours, but that included picking up his medicine and the explanation of what we should expect for side effects. Next time should be shorter for the chemo, though a longer stay because it's at the same time as the Rotuxin.

The social worker also came in today to talk to us for the first time. As anyone who has met Tim already knows, he's not exactly one who tends to open up, but he is one of the most amiable people I know. It was slightly amusing to hear him trying to balance politeness and reservedness while talking to the social worker about what he's going through. She might have more success with getting him to open up without me there, so next time I'll leave the room when she arrives.

That was our day and it was a long one. Only five more chemo treatments to go, so that's sending us off to bed with smiles on our faces!

The Big C

We went to the oncologist, Dr. G, for the first time on Wednesday, August 12. Dr. G told us that Tim has large diffuse b cell lymphoma, which has a 65-70% cure rate. He said the percentage of people who do have success with the treatment are completely free of the disease, that it isn't likely to reoccur when we beat it. Tim has chemotherapy once every three weeks for the next 18 weeks and we are going to see how he's responding from there to determine if any other treatment is necessary. So with any luck, he'll be cancer free sometime in January.

His treatments began the following day, Thursday, August 13. Though this type of cancer is very treatable, it is also very aggressive and they started as soon as possible. His usual treatment will be R-CHOP, which is an acronym for 5 different kinds of medicine. The R and the P are Rotuxin and Prednisone. He started the Prednisone, which comes in the pill form for T, on Thursday morning. He takes four of the pills in the morning and the worst side effects are that they make him feel a little jittery, which is why they told him to take them in the morning.

Friday was the first time for the Rotuxin, which is distributed by IV, and Tim sat in a chair for 4.5 hours getting the medicine. Evanston hospital has wireless internet, so I was and will be in the future able to work from his bedside, which is clearly awesome. The nurse, Colleen, was very cheerful and kept popping in to his room to say that he was doing great. While some patients have adverse reactions that slow down the treatment, T was fine and he got through with the IV sooner than expected for his first time. He was a little loopy from the Benadryl that they gave him and thus thoroughly enjoyed both The Journey to the Center of the Earth (2008 version) and Get Smart . There was a minor rant somewhere in there about how the first movie undermines a child's education by misrepresenting scientific fact, but I tuned that out after about the first 45 seconds. Today, he's feeling fine.

C, H, and O from R-CHOP are all chemotherapy drugs, which he begins on Monday. They only take about 1/2 hour. In the future they'll do it at the same time as the Rotuxin, but this time the appointments were split.

Tim may lose his hair, including possibly his eyebrows and eyelashes. So if next time you see him he looks like Sean Patrick Flanery from Powder, don't be surprised! He is already breathing a little bit better and the doctor said he should feel the positive effects of the chemo by Tuesday or Wednesday. We have a bumpy road ahead, but we're geared for the fight and ready to go!

Hey, wha happen?

For those of you who are unaware of the back story, this one goes out to you. Tim has had a cough since around March or April of this year. He had complained about it occasionally, but mostly just to say that he was getting older (29 is ancient, right?) and could no longer complete tasks he could easily do in his dashing youth. I kept nagging at him to go to the doctor and finally one Sunday he agreed because he was getting out of breath. The following morning I made an appointment for Tuesday, July 28. Fast forward to doc's office.

Our gp (general practitioner), Dr. B., was very nice when we came in, but it was clear that he did not think it anything serious, so I was feeling relieved and I think Tim was as well. He sent us down for a chest x-ray just to be safe (shout out to Dr. B on that one!) and T went in to get one. He came out about 20 minutes later and said we could go, but the radiologist suddenly came out after us and informed us that we needed to go up to Dr. B's office again. Scary. We followed her up and sat in the waiting room for her to show Dr. B.

2 years later (or 5 minutes, who can tell?), the gp came and took us into his office. He showed us the x-ray and pointed out a mass in Tim's chest on the right side, just above and next to his heart. He told us it looked like lymphoma and it was serious. We were to go downstairs again and see if we could get in for a CAT scan ASAP. Downstairs we went.

We came back two hours later for the chest CAT scan, the following day for bloodwork. I left for vacation (perfect timing, right?) and Tim's close friend took him to the biopsy of his chest on Friday. We got a definite 'yes' on lymphoma from the gp on the following Monday and went in for a PET scan on Thursday. The next Monday was another CAT scan, this one of his pelvic area, and we went to see the oncologist, or cancer specialist, on Wednesday, August 12. Enter Dr. G...cancer has officially been diagnosed.

Welcome!

Welcome, friends and family! Thank you for visiting the blog and for your concern about Tim. For those of you whom I have not yet met, your author and guide through this journey is Molly, Tim's betrothed. T suggested I write a blog to keep everyone informed about his cancer course and I will try my best to keep it up! We do not want to divorce ourselves from those we care about, but emailing or calling everyone for updates after appointments is proving not feasible already. Keeping our friends and extended family in the loop without fear of carpal tunnel or hoarseness, then, is our main objective with this blog. If you want to call, we'd love to hear from you. Don't be offended, however, if you don't hear back for a week or so; if you're worried, check the blog. Hopefully I won't have fallen behind on my duties. That said, let's get started!